Well, really I haven't been a slacker. I've just been busy with gymnastics season. That runs from November until mid-February...now. We should be done this saturday unless the planets align and someone makes the state championships. Part of me would love that very much, but the rest of me misses having a life and just wants the season to be over. One of my buddies walked into church yesterday and saw me and said "I shouldn't say it, I know, but we should get together." Gymnastics really puts a hit on my available girly time.
Another reason why I've been a slacker is because life has been rather heavy. I haven't said much about our adoption in a long time. I don't know how I compare to others that have adopted but I tend to share only the pretty and sweet parts of life with adopted kids. As with most things there is a flip side. I can honestly say I've cried longer and harder in the last 3 months than maybe in my entire life. The truth of the situation is that God knows and is in control. The negative of the situation is that I am human and what we are walking through is harder than anything I've ever walked through. The strength required is Divine strength. It's comforting knowing that God has our family in His hands. It's hard, though, to suppress the human side that wants to handle it myself (as if that were possible). We are being proactive but I feel somewhat helpless. There aren't words to adequately describe the darkness I feel we're battling. I feel angry and sad and it hasn't left me with much levity lately.
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