Quarters

When I was a child a quarter was A LOT of money. Rarely was I fortunate enough to be so "rich". Quarters were my favorite kind of money. They got you more stuff that pennies, nickels, or dimes. I loved how heavy they felt in my hands. Having TWO quarters was almost too much for my young self to handle. I would feel "drunk" with richness. Interestingly enough, quarters are still my favorite coins.

The sad truth is that quarters don't hold the spending power I was once so sure of. Perhaps I should change my desires to align closer to my childhood desires. Maybe I should just go back to longing for giant gumballs.

As I grew into adulthood I learned how to manage money. I established spending habits. In my young adulthood I learned especially how to live on very little.

Now I'm living in the castle that Hubby Guy bought me. When the thought of living in a castle one day came to me I vowed to myself this one thing: I vowed that as I was making the castle my own I would decorate it exactly the way I like without regard for the cost. The truth of me is that I tend toward cheap. I choose function over form.

Hubby Guy is so cool that he gave me a house "budget" that I can use as I wish to fix the castle however I like. Initially the thought was really wild and exciting (especially since I consider the budget to be very generous.. so generous that the amount is best expressed in dollars, not quarters). Now I'm faced with a grim reality. I have chosen to be cheap all these years and dismissed what I really like for so long that I'm not sure what I really like.

Another troubling point is that generally I'm a very organized person. Shopping for house stuff overwhelms me. I had some great help recently. We spent a whole day going from store to store. It helped to have a person that at least knows how to decorate. Even with a trusted helper, though, I felt scattered and overwhelmed.

I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but it seems like whenever I have money for whatever I want I either don't want anything or can't decide exactly what I want. When I have no money I want everything and can't have it. I wonder if there's scripture that speaks to that particular issue?  Anyway, I feel like a kid with a whole mason jar full of quarters. I'm positively paralyzed with possibility.

I've decided upon a game plan. I thought I had decided on the same game plan before I moved in but somehow I got distracted. I'm gonna focus on one room at a time. I'm gonna narrow my thinking a bit. I heard somewhere a piece of very applicable wisdom: How do you eat an elephant?.... one bite at a time.